Another month, another two weeks of agonizing wait. My temperature dropped this morning, although some part of me still holds out a perverse hope that it is just an implantation 'dip'. This is unlikely because the temperature dropped significantly. If this is the case, I just had an 8-day luteal phase.
Something is clearly wrong with me. I do think my hormones are out of whack. I'm going to get a yearly checkup in a couple of weeks, and then it's off to see a fertility specialist.
It is even more painful when my students ask me if I have children, and when I say no, they say "Why not? Don't you want to have children?"
Everything in me wants to scream, "YES, I want children, but I can't have any because I am infertile! So stop f*ing asking me that question!!!"
I can't stand to look at Facebook any more because of all the baby pictures of friends. It's even hard when they come to visit and let me hold their sweet little one. It makes it all the more painful.
Anyway, I must get ready for work, which I now hate. Is it winter break yet?
