Try again

Well, I had my temp drop this morning, so it looks like we'll be trying again next cycle. I feel a heavy sort of disappointment and at the same time, worry. I worry that something's wrong with me (probably not) because I was hungry all the time for a few weeks there and kept getting up in the middle of the night to pee. Maybe I just have a tapeworm.

I've been reading a book about parasites, that's probably why I said that.

I'll just have to let go and try again. Have to stay positive!

That thing called Hope

I've been using the FAM method to determine fertility for the last 5 months now. I am really amazed at my body and all the signs it gives me to let me know what's going on. I don't feel panicked when I'm not sure if achy-ness means impending period or pregnancy because I can see on my chart what's happening. I don't get disappointed or crushed like I did when I didn't know. I've learned a lot about myself, like the fact that I have a long phase before I ovulate. Most of my cycles are 32+ days, which I learned is actually not unusual. And it's funny, now, when I have just felt like I've got everything figured out...my temps rose really early this cycle and are staying up. I'm trying hard to just relax and wait, because each day brings me closer to finding out if I've achieved my goal or if this is just a blip.

In other news, I've gotten 'informally' hired for a part-time teaching job at a local high school. However, school starts in 3 weeks, and I haven't yet heard back from the principal or signed a contract. I'm getting nervous, because I need this job. Hopefully a friendly barrage of phone calls will get me the answers I'm looking for so that I can sit back and focus on lesson plans and inquiry learning.

Last day of summer classes (ones I'm taking, not teaching). I'm really happy to be done with them. Nothing like cramming a whole course into 5 weeks. But at least I'll be done.

Namaste!