Here I am, 6 days post-surgery, laying on the couch (again).
I had a laparoscopy last week to see what my problems might be. I had the tiniest amount of endometriosis. I also had a small cyst on my uterus and some scar tissue in the neck of my cervix. None of these things should have been a problem or barrier to my fertility, and to all intents and purposes, I am normal and healthy.
Part of me is relieved. Part of me is confused- I'm not pregnant, we've been trying, nothing is apparently wrong with me, so why can't we conceive?
I guess I should be thankful, at least, that nothing is seriously wrong. I'm glad that my worries were laid to rest.
*sigh* I guess we'll start trying again, as soon as I'm healed enough......
Showing posts with label surgery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label surgery. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
Thursday, June 13, 2013
Distractions
I think I've been avoiding thinking about not being pregnant.
Partly by keeping myself as busy and distracted as possible. This worked great during the school year; I hardly had time to brush my teeth, much less think about the reasons for my infertility.
Now it's summer, and although I have a few classes, I have more time to spare and time to think. It hit me the other day while I was watching the documentary Bully- which I would recommend to every single child, parent, educator, et al, out there. It's absolutely heartbreaking to see how cruel people can be to each other, especially children. I lost it during the part of the film where an 11-year-old boy was talking about losing his friend (who committed suicide because he was being bullied). How difficult that must have been for the parents!
And then I listened to a Radiolab podcast about a young couple who was infertile and decided to adopt, only to have the child taken away from them because of a misunderstanding. I can't envision the pain they must be in.
I feel awful for them- those that had children and lost them after tragic circumstances. Somehow it makes my situation less awful because at least I don't have to go through legal battles or too-early funerals. God.
I'll be having surgery in July- a laparoscopy so that the doctor can peek inside my abdominal cavity and see if I have endometriosis, which he says is likely. I haven't had any symptoms, but sometimes apparently endometriosis can be like that. I'm nervous- I don't relish the idea of another surgery, but that's the only way to figure out what's really going on in there.
And as a post-note: People out there, PLEASE think about what you say before you say it. The other day we had a friend over who was commenting on a couple he knows who spent 2 years trying to get pregnant (not us) and said, "I mean, you think they'd just give up after a while." It was like a big fat slap in the face, even though he was totally oblivious to our situation.
Partly by keeping myself as busy and distracted as possible. This worked great during the school year; I hardly had time to brush my teeth, much less think about the reasons for my infertility.
Now it's summer, and although I have a few classes, I have more time to spare and time to think. It hit me the other day while I was watching the documentary Bully- which I would recommend to every single child, parent, educator, et al, out there. It's absolutely heartbreaking to see how cruel people can be to each other, especially children. I lost it during the part of the film where an 11-year-old boy was talking about losing his friend (who committed suicide because he was being bullied). How difficult that must have been for the parents!
And then I listened to a Radiolab podcast about a young couple who was infertile and decided to adopt, only to have the child taken away from them because of a misunderstanding. I can't envision the pain they must be in.
I feel awful for them- those that had children and lost them after tragic circumstances. Somehow it makes my situation less awful because at least I don't have to go through legal battles or too-early funerals. God.
I'll be having surgery in July- a laparoscopy so that the doctor can peek inside my abdominal cavity and see if I have endometriosis, which he says is likely. I haven't had any symptoms, but sometimes apparently endometriosis can be like that. I'm nervous- I don't relish the idea of another surgery, but that's the only way to figure out what's really going on in there.
And as a post-note: People out there, PLEASE think about what you say before you say it. The other day we had a friend over who was commenting on a couple he knows who spent 2 years trying to get pregnant (not us) and said, "I mean, you think they'd just give up after a while." It was like a big fat slap in the face, even though he was totally oblivious to our situation.
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